Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Inciting Panic

I’ve been struggling with what to write this week.  I suppose because some of the thoughts in my head are not suitable for public consumption.  If they were suitable, I’d be happy to share them, but sometimes … well sometimes I need to practice that grace thing and try to learn.

Occasionally I just need to go drink coffee and not be around people.

I feel like I have stepped into another dimension.  And it’s not even the Twilight Zone.  Oh the Twilight Zone is calling to me … I can still hear it … I’m just a step or two away at the moment.  And the phrase it’s whispering to me this week is most interesting.

So.  Labels.  And assumptions still.  And this psychological study I somehow find myself conducting.

My labels of “strong and independent” & “dependable and reliable” are making me weary lately.  I have come by those labels naturally over many years.  When you don’t have anyone knocking down the door to take care of things for you … you figure it out yourself.  When you ask for help & don’t get it … you figure it out yourself.  When others offer to help … and then you ask … and then they let you down … you figure it out yourself.

I don’t mean to be Wendy Whiner here, just observing what appears to be a theme all-of-a-sudden just lately.

I lift my eyes unto the hills … where does my help come from …  

Yeah, that’s pretty much it.  I count on God.  He rocks.  Always.  And as the saying goes … he doesn’t give us more than we can handle, but I wish he didn’t think so much of me sometimes. 

And I wish chivalry weren’t dead.  I’m always delighted when someone offers to carry heavy things for me.  So I guess it’s not completely dead. 

Have you ever asked a question and got an answer back to a completely different question?  And it opened up a whole can of worms? 

Lest you think there are squirrels running rampant across this page, let me explain.  I was looking for help with something recently.  Looking for a little chivalry I suppose.  And before I could even get to the “would you please” part … well … I think I got a can of worms.  An open can.

There I go again, inciting panic.  Maybe I come by that naturally too.  I have been referred to as “Trouble” more than once.  J

Here, let me take care of that for you.

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